Wedding Dress Shopping as a Neurodivergent Person

Information

Oct 2

Image: Vicky Dubois Photography, Dress: Morena, Headpiece, veil and belt: Anansie

If you listen to the media, wedding dress shopping is the most magical part of wedding planning. It’s portrayed in movies as the most exciting, fun and celebratory occasion where all your close family and friends drink champagne while you have an amazing time trying on dresses.

Wedding dress shopping can feel magical … and it can also feel completely overwhelming and anxiety inducing. If you’re neurodivergent (ADHD, autistic, sensory sensitive, or simply have a beautifully busy brain), the thought of appointments, mirrors, and lots of decision-making can feel like a LOT.

You’re not alone – we KNOW first-hand what you’re feeling and the emotions you’re going through, and you deserve to feel celebrated, comfortable, and empowered when finding your dress.

Here’s our guide to making dress shopping work for you.

1. Prepare Your Brain for Success

• Do a little research first: Collect inspiration images and jot down what you love about them. Understanding what you are drawn to can make the appointment less overwhelming and give you a starting point. NOTE: It’s just as valid to know what you don’t like

• Bring your safe person: A trusted friend, partner, or family member can help you advocate for your needs and ground you if things get intense. FYI Your partner is SO welcome in your appointment.

• Communicate needs in advance: We are very open to tailoring the appointment to your needs. We are pretty good at seeing when someone needs a break, or to sit for a minute, but please please do let us know if there’s anything that would help you feel calmer; if you need us to lower the music, or softer lighting, or you’d prefer we don’t help you into dresses — we welcome these requests!

2. Sensory Considerations

• Textures: If you have sensory sensitivities, be open about how you feel. We aren’t going to be offended if you don’t like something about any dress. Maybe the fabrics are itchy, or too heavy, or too structured. Knowing these things, we can direct you to different styles or alternative fabrics and other options.

o When you’ve narrowed down your selection and possibly found ‘the one’ it’s worth taking time to stand in the dress a little longer so that you can fully appreciate how it feels

• Noise & Environment: We understand how general noise and music not only affects the vibe but can fray your senses. If you know music really affects you, please feel free to ask us to turn the music down, or off. Another idea is to ask about the quietest appointment times (usually weekdays) if busy studios are stressful.

We also understand how beneficial the right music can be, so we are in the process of creating several different playlists for you to choose from when you arrive… or you are more than welcome to bring your own playlists

3. Managing Executive Function

• Decision Paralysis: It’s normal to freeze when given too many options. Throughout the process of trying dresses, we ask you to compare: Do you feel better in this one or the last one, are there any details you love, are there any details you hate etc. We find different ways to discover your preferences gradually and eliminate options as we go so avoiding big decisions.

• Allocate someone to take photos and make notes on likes and dislikes: We aren’t into pressure tactics and welcome you taking the time to process everything you’ve tried on. Reviewing images later can reduce pressure to decide on the spot, and checking out the notes can remind you how you felt in each dress.

• Follow-Up: We are always here to discuss any aspect of the process with you. No questions are silly questions. It’s unlike any other dress purchase you will ever make and we appreciate it can be very daunting.

4. Emotional Regulation & Overwhelm

• Stimming and Movement: Do what you need to self-regulate — we won’t judge. It’s an everyday part of Legend. Rachel is most productive when she’s also learning a new skill through her earbuds, Chloe often needs to get up and do a little dance. We probably won’t even notice

• Scheduled Breaks: Step outside, breathe, reset. It’s okay to pause or even to come back another day.

• Compassion for Yourself: Big feelings are normal when trying on wedding dresses — let them happen.

5. Finding a Designer Who Gets It Choose a bridal studio that celebrates all kinds of people and all kinds of brains.

Your comfort matters as much as the gown itself. At Legend, we try to be the place you feel valued and able to be yourself. We want to be an inclusive, sensory-aware space for our nearly-weds. We want you to leave feeling seen, supported, and buzzing with excitement about your wedding, not drained or frazzled.

You Deserve Joyful Dress Shopping Your wedding dress journey should feel like it belongs to you — not like you’re trying to fit into someone else’s idea of what it “should” look like. With the right support, preparation, and a team who understands neurodivergence, finding your gown can be a joyful, empowering experience.

We’d love to hear your thoughts — are there things you think we’ve missed? Leave a comment or share your story with us.

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Charlotte Yates

Wedding Dress Shopping as a Neurodivergent Person